Psychic Cat Predictions for 2020!

As the decade nears its conclusion, The Whisker Times recently met with The Amazing Pendragon for an exclusive interview to discuss his predictions for the upcoming new year. Pendragon, a renowned cat psychic and mystical seer, offered the following shocking insights into 2020:

• Peace talks between cats and vacuum cleaners will disintegrate into outright chaos when a dust buster unexpectedly enters the household scene in April. Despite promising peace dialogues earlier in August (as reported by The Whisker Times), negotiations will deteriorate as the new dust buster causes unexpected, handheld horror for cats in the house.

• An aloof and independent cat in the U.S. state of Kentucky will genuinely surprise his caregivers in October by not only welcoming their affection but will also knead dough and make biscuits while doing so. This unexpected display of reciprocal love will last 45 seconds and be immediately followed by biting and rabbit kicking.

• Scientists in Europe will develop a device in June that will incredibly allow cats to speak with human speech. After spending 45 million euros on the project, the first words from the cat will be as follows: “I want to stare blankly at the wall for the next two hours.”

• The Whisker Times cat newspaper will become the most trusted source of news on the planet Mars when cat astronauts (catstronauts) successfully colonize the red planet thanks to faithful readers like you purchasing an official The Whisker Times sticker on eBay at the link here. Readers are pleased that the stickers cost less than $3 each and are shipped free. Catstronaunts rename the planet MeowMars.